Have had no internet for a few days, as some of you on my FB probably have seen. It stinks, especially when I was trying to put some Ebay stuff up and get homework done to where I need the internet. Turns out my very expensive wireless router lies. While it says it's connected, it's actually not. Maybe. Idunno. So I have an ethernet cable hooked up to it for now. Hopefully everything will work itself out soon.

So, some fabulous news...I am going to FL for Thanksgiving!! I'm so excited. This will be the first major holiday I'll be spending with my family in 3 years. I can't wait to see everyone. And my dad and step-mom will be there, too! Sorry to my FL friends though, I will not have time to hang out as I'll only be there for 2 days and Wednesday we're going to Disney.
I'm very excited!

Saw Inglorious Basterds yesterday, which was amazing! Seriously not what I expected. Quintin Tarantino is a god. I actually want to see it again. I'm so glad it'll be out on DVD soon cause I need to get it. I need to find a collection of his movies. Eli Roth and Brad Pitt were awesome in that movie!

Also saw New Moon last night. AMAZING! Way better than Twilight and followed the book much more. Like, word-by-word phrases and scenes straight from the book, unaltered. I loved it! I want to see it again RIGHT NOW, but no one wants to go with me and I hate going to the theater alone. I pseudo dressed as Alice. My outfit was about 85% close to the one she wears at the end of the movie, but I didn't have a wig on. I had a massive head ache. Ugh. Probably from the screen at Inglorious Basterds. It was slightly out of focus and hurt my eyes.

Well, that's about it I guess. Not much going right now. Steve's sick, so send happy thoughts for him to get better.
Will write again soon. Maybe after Thanksgiving.

Wasting time during the NM premiere.

This is cute! I think I did one like this a few years ago. So enjoy. Yeah, like y'all want to know about me. ;)
( About me )

Well, today went well. Had a short shift at work. Manager met up with me in the stock room and we kinda went over everything. And maybe I sounded mean about a lot of things and he sounded mean, too, but we kinda got to an understanding. Turns out I'm not the only one with anxiety issues and we both get overly stressed about work. We're both adjusting. He doesn't understand the military life and I don't understand why he doesn't understand anything. We both have issues communicating with each other and both of us handle stress completely differently. We talked for over 2 hours!! It felt good to get a lot of that off my chest and he was happy that he finally got some answers. However, I still am looking for a new job within my college major, but nothing is coming up so far. But he totally understands, he just asked that I hold out til after holiday. I also told him about some of the resentment I have toward him, which I've never told anyone, that started when the DM and RM kept pussy-footing around how the store would be mine after Jen left and then they never gave it to me. They never offered me the position nor told me why they decided not to offer me the position. It was supposed to be my store and instead they brought in someone else and that killed me. That made me bitter. It really did. I'm so glad I told my manager this, because he completely understands and agrees that it was shitty of them to promise one thing and then screw me over completely. I'm glad I told him that. It felt good getting that out. We're both adjusting. We both manage differently. We are two stubborn adults who feel that our way is always right and while we'll consider another way to do something we'll probably go back to our original way.
We went over a LOT of stuff. The end of it is that we are coming to an understandable and we both need to listen more and communicate more. He understands that I don't do well with confrontations, but he did tell him to write things down or send him an email with whatever is bothering me. He says I would make a great store manager and when given the opportunity I should take it.

So, yes, I think I may stay for a little longer now that we've finally figured a few things out. AND I didn't cry. I was afraid I would start bawling like a baby while going over everything, but I didn't. I did start shaking a bit, but that was the anxious person in me, and it didn't last long.
So, that's it.
Just letting you know. =)
Thank you everyone for the well-wishes and prayers. Keep the positive flow coming!!

And a wonderful and fabulous HAPPY BIRTHDAY to lil_krn_yuna and meahtsingan !!!!!

I hope you two had a great birthday. I know the weather is kinda sucky, but I hope you were able to hang out with friends and/or family.
Plus, miss you both!!

Someone who can dye/paint fabric pretty well...please contact me! Possibly need to commission a couple pieces before end of January.
Thank you!! My LJ image thingie won't open up pictures for some reason right now, but I'll try and upload something soon.
Thanks in advance!

You all MUST watch this!!

So, the week went well. Got a lot done last week. Prepped for inventory. The store numbers improved. Yay!
Then...the bomb dropped.
( Do you really want to know about my day? )

Well, after calling HR about the stress in the store and other crazy crap going on, I got a call from my DM wanting to talk. So we went over a few things, not everything, but as much as we were able to cause the store got busy. He told me not to stress too much about losing my job, that my numbers have improved this week and I need to stay focused, which I do. But the important part was he told me not to worry about losing my job. He also told me he'd talk to my manager, who needs to work on his tact about relaying messages and not to "scare" his employees. Sorry, scare tactics are NOT motivating to me. They just make things worse, and they did.

I also went back to B&N and while I was checking out asked the manager about my application. He said he say mine and has it aside, but they have zero management spots available right now. It stinks. He said he'd like them to hire me, but nothing can be done at the moment. But he said to come back towards the beginning of the year and ask about any available management positions. Well, it's not much, but at least my foot is in the door. The managers know my name and they have my app set aside (bonus!), so we'll see what happens next!

Bought season 4 of Buffy today, some books (got book 1 and 2 of Cirque du Freak), and a bedside lamp (finally!!).

Work has been good this week. I say it's because the manager isn't there and everything is organized and where it all should be. But, who knows. I could be wrong. Things got done. Lots of things. I'm glad we had a productive week. We have an inventory coming up soon. I'm sad that I won't be there to work on it, but we hired an outside company to do it...probably those Regis morons. We never have any luck with them. I can't stand anyone they hire through Regis, never could.

Ok well I better get back to work (school work, that is). I just cannot focus on it right now (which is a whole other story).
Hope everyone had a fun Halloween! I had friends come over, watched Serenity (well, I had it on from earlier that evening and then we all ended up watching it anyway), and passed out candy to kids. I have TONS of candy leftover!! Oi. Guess I'll bring it all to work.

Hope everyone had a great weekend and has a good week. I seriously hope November is better than December.

So, our little store seems to be falling apart. People are unhappy. We've lost two employees during the week. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm trying to be optimistic about it, but I can't keep going. But, Barnes and Nobles is hiring and they may have a couple manager spots open so I'm going to bring in my resume and the application on Sunday. Who knows. Maybe something good will come of it. I'd hate to leave the store, because it's 5 minutes from home, the pay is great, I love the hours, but they're doing nothing for me anymore. The passion is gone. Seriously. Gone.

Rinoa is doing much better. Just waiting for the scabs to heal up. I think whatever fleas are on her are dying off little by little. After scrubbing the heck out of her and brushing a lot of fleas out the other day I noticed she's not scratching nearly as much as last week. Thank goodness.

I also believe I have serious anxiety problems. It seems at least once a day I get chest pains and have that feeling of "something bad is gonna happen and I can't control it". I've also been thinking the worst of everything and I'm never like that. My mom, whom I LOVE, is currently doing a group (she's a social worker) on anxiety and she's sending me her packet for her group. She wants me to read it and do some the exercises. Also I'm gonna talk to my therapist about it and see what can be done. Between work (mostly work), school, money and Steve being gone...I'm falling apart right now. No one can pick up the pieces but me.

I need a change of scenery or something. I think because of my anxiety I'm going to take the spring semester off to clear my head and collect my thoughts. It's just one semester. I'll be going back, but I need a break to figure things out. I wish Steve were home. I miss talking to him. I miss having him here to just hold me and give me his thoughts and advise. Why is it everytime he leaves things fall apart? I just want to sit and cry, but some how I can't even bring myself to do that. I feel empty. I feel lost.

I've also come to the realization that I have no clue what I want to do in life. I feel like so many of my friends are beyond what I could possibly be and I'm still in the sidelines trying to get a play. I've changed my mind so many times as to what I really want to do in life. I'm going back to school and now I'm not even sure why. I really want to work in radio or television, but I have no clue as to what. I can't even get an interview with someone in HR at the local radio stations and tv stations.

I just have a lot of thinking to way. Way more thinking that I want to do. My headaches are coming back more frequent since all this started. My stress and anxiety levels are way up. I just need something to change. Something good to happen.

Thanks for reading. I love having LJ as an outlet for what's going on. I know some of you care and I appreciate it. I wish some of you all lived closer.

Um wow. They just did the Argentinian tango to They on Dancing With the Stars. How cool is that?! Mya was fabulous, btw. (Ok, well now it's been a couple dances ago)

Work was ok. Co-ASM's last day is Thursday. I hate how the company pretty much forced him to quit. It's awful. And one of our GA's quit yesterday. Thankfully our manager was on the ball with the hiring and we had a new guy working today. I think he'll fit in just fine.

I'm so hooked on Glee I downloaded a bunch of their songs from iTunes. The guy who plays Finn is too adorable...and he's my age. He's so yummy. I just love the show. It's fabulous.

I need to get out of my lazy state and get the spare bedroom organized again. I haven't touched it much since after Dragon*Con and I really need to get back into sewing some costumes for next year. I hate when Steve leaves. I get lazy for a few weeks and I need to stop that.

Rinoa is doing better. Hasn't been scratching as much and I think some of the fleas are finally dying. Tomorrow she is getting a bath so I can wash away a bunch of the fleas and crap in her fur. Thank goodness I have off tomorrow.

I made a massive batch of meatballs, too. YUMM! I put aside 25 for the guys at work since they all go crazy for them. Plus it'll be my co-ASMs last day soon and I know he'd love something like that as a good-bye gift. I love making meatballs. I feel like it's the only true Italian dish I know how to make, even moreso because it's my grandmoms recipe. I wish were able to get more recipes before my nonna passed away and before my grandmom forgot nearly everything (Alzheimers). Sadness.

Well I'm off to finish watching my shows. Class in the AM. I feel like I'm so far behind. I've been making notecards since we have an exam next week. I hope I do well.
Later.

First off, thank you to those who replied/messaged/text me about my previous post. I miss Steve a lot. I have my moment of getting a little teary eyed, but so far it's been ok. One week down. So thank you to everyone for your support. It's nice to have it.
It's been a decent week so far. Overly stressed from work. I'm still looking for a new job. I've gotten a couple e-mails from places asking for an interview, but I'm very hesitant on places that don't actually have the company name and what it does in the e-mail and no website link provided. Very uncertain about those. Oh wells. Gonna keep looking. I just need to get away from retail, somehow.

Puppy is doing well. Had a vet appointment this morning. Spent lots of $$ for her meds, Heart Guard, FrontLine and updating all her shots. Oi. So much for having extra $ set aside. I'd rather make sure my puppy is healthy first. She got a skin infection and fleas REALLY bad. Poor baby. I gave her some meds and Benedryl and it calmed her down a little earlier. It was the most peaceful and calm she's been in two weeks. Poor Rinoa. But hopefully all these meds will make her better. She'll also get a bath again (for the third time in two weeks!!) on Sunday. Much scrubbing.

Went to Oktoberfest at Uchee Creek with my friend Patrick and his g/f Lexi. It was fun. Ate much much yummy food!! I drank this spiced wine type drink called Gluhwein and it was so good. I want more! Apparently they have a store here in Columbus. I will go there and get more food and drink.

Work tomorrow then floorset at AE. Ugh. It's gonna be a long day. I wish I had time between to take a nap. I'm off on Sunday but I have to be at work from 9-10 for a store meeting. Should be fun. A meeting to tell us how crappy our numbers are. Fabulous.

Ugh. I don't feel like talking about work right now. I'll start getting stressed again. I get far too stressed over work.

Well, I'm off. Hope everyone has a great weekend.

Well, Steve is on his way to Iraq right now. I hate saying good bye. It never gets easier. I'm always fine up until the day before/day of, then I lose it.
I feel like a mopey mess right now. And whenever Steve isn't home my hormones go all out of whack. I cry at everything. I hate shows like Extreme Home Makeover when Steve's gone. I watch them all the time, but I am a mess when Steve is gone watching shows like that.

It's just so hard, ya know? I mean, I know it's part of his job. This is what he does. But it's still hard to say good bye. It's hard to be forced to say good bye to the one you love so much and for 12 months! I've done this twice before. You'd think it would be a smoother transition this time around, but it's not. He's going back to Iraq. He's on his way right now. At least this time they'll have internet in their CHU this time and both of our laptops have cameras and we signed up for Skype. Maybe this won't be too bad. It'll be nice to hear from him more often since he won't be going on missions. I'm grateful that he's not going to Afghanistan, but I have a friend who will next year for his deployment. And Steve is rooming with a really good friends of his, so I'm glad they'll have each other to keep calm. His friend and his wife just found out they were gonna have a baby a week ago, so I know it won't be easy for them. But I'm here and she knows to call me whenever she needs anything.

I will try and visit and hang out with everyone when I can. I just hate being here by myself when Steve's not here. I'm also trying to find a new job and I hope it will be for the better. I feel so depressed right now. I'm sure there's some type of school work I should be doing or studying for, but I can't bring myself to do it.

I miss Steve a lot already. There's still camo stuff everywhere that he didn't have room to bring that I need to mail out. Time to bring out this old Navy work shirt he used to wear that I always use as a blankie when he's deployed...and a stuff bear I bought him for our first Christmas. I need to cuddle things.

OH if anyone wants Steve's Iraq address please let me know. If anyone wants to get care packages together for him or any soldiers over there (he can give boxes to anyone on his FOB), please let me know. I'd be happy to send you his mailing address.

Ok, I'm still crying. I miss him. I miss my friends.
Thanks for listening to me. I'll have a few sad and sappy posts until I get things back on track.
Many hugs to you all. Steve said he will try and update his FB and LJ once they get everything situated over there.

Other than careerbuilders.com can anyone reccomend other online resume posting sites? That's the only one I can think of. I also posted my resume up on this JobLinks site through one of the local tv stations. I also sent them my resume in hopes something will come up.
Say, since I don't have an outside opinion, anyone mind looking at my resume to see if I should edit anything or touch up parts? I can post it "friends only" if needs be. It's been a while since I've worked on it. There's a lot of Sea World stuff in there, only because I worked at so many different areas of the park and did a lot of different things.
Even my manager at American Eagle is calling the DM to see if she'll let me back. Too bad there are so ASM positions available, but she's asking anyway. I really want to avoid going back to the mall, but if needs be than I'll take it. At least the pay is good and the manager has no problem working with my school schedule.

Thanks!!! =)
I'm so stressed!!
Between work, school and deployment...I need a vacation.

Good weekend was had. Busy weekend. I've never driven around Atlanta so much.

Got there Saturday kinda late because of horrible traffic and road construction. Seriously people, learn to drive. K?
Chilled in the room for a bit then got hungry. Perused food websites and decided to eat at The Highlander. OMG, delicious food! $42 for three beers, two entrees, soup and an appetizer. Could not even finish our sandwiches, but we'll definitely eat there again. I wanted to get some yummy-ness at Rita's since I couldn't believe there was on in Atlanta, but I was way too full.
Were in bed by 9:45pm...gosh, we're old and broken.

Saturday was fabulous. Checked out, went to Cracker Barrel. Yumm. Decided to waste some time before meeting friends for lunch so we found the Perimeter Mall and wandered around. Got a tin for my soap bar from Lush and got Steve some tea from Teavana. I found a few other things in stores that I really want, but have no $$. lol. Next time.
1pm rolled around so we drove over to the Flying Biscuit to meet micarei and vampirate777. More yummy food and it seemed like none of us could finish our food. Had a very flaky waitress who never brought Mary her pancake, but somehow refilled Steve's drink and never came back after that. Idunno. It was weird.

After that we met up with Beth at Netherworld. Went to this cheap theater and saw The Collector. FREAKY!! It creeped me out, but I think it prepared me for Netherworld. Great movie, but seriously freaked me out.
So once that was over we headed over to Netherworld. It was nice having someone who worked there as our guide. Of course, me being into costumes and whatnot I was too busy ooo-ing and aaah-ing at the costumes and backdrops and whatnot to be scared by the people wandering around the parking lot. However, there were a lot of people that got freaked out. It was funny.
I thought I was gonna seriously get spooked, but I didn't. I kept making Steve hold my hand or stay behind me, cause at one time I was at a haunted house I thought my sis was behind me, but she wasn't and it was a creepy person in a costume. Didn't like that.
The houses were amazing!! The stories were great. The only times I jumped was when I was walking forward and walked right into a glass wall (yeah, right into it) to where a guy in costume jumped out and banged onto the wall which got me in the face and then I jumped back and elbowed Steve. Oops. Then as we were leaving and walking to the giftshop one of the guys at the exit saw my vulnerability (I thought we were in the clear because we were well enough outside) and jumped out at me. Sheesh.
I was too busy oogling all the costumes and sets and such to focus on things scaring me. However, scary zombies and demons are very kind. I got lost (somehow I was in the lead) and I kept opening curtains that had employees hiding behind them and they were all "Wrong door" and got me to the right one.

It was great though. Definitely had a good time. Go to Netherworld if you can! It's great. Not as scary as I was expecting, but we had a good time. It was just nice to see friends.

That's about it. Just wasting time before going to work. I'm lazy this morning.
Later.

Ok, so it looks like I'll be doing my first steampunk cosplay for Drgaon*con next year. OMG I know, I'm a sheep. lol. BUT one group member picked a theme. Disney steampunk! FUN! I'm sure it's been done, but I've never seen it.
I've decided on doing Belle. It's kinda fitting since her father is an inventor, so maybe I can incorporate something interesting into it.
Now, I'm so unsure about what to do. Looks like we're all gonna get together and give each other ideas for how to put these pieces together. I know a lot of you have done steampunk already.
Do you have any suggestions for turning Belle to steampunk? I'm just in debate on whether or now I want to use the yellow color from her ballgown or stick with blues from her normal dress. Trying to figure out how to keep it recognizable as Belle has become a difficult task for me. I guess I'm not as creative as I used to be. =(
Thanks!

Wow, what a mess!
After attempting to call for 30 minutes I gave up, went to a computer and booked a room that way. It was a king bed, but it was a room. I get a text from my friend Chandra just minutes after telling me she booked a room just in case. She got and double bed!! OMG, Chandra rocks. But I am keeping my king size for her friends that might go. And my friend Patrick (one of the Repo Men from this past DC) also was able to book a room for him and his girlfriend and one for his friends. Yay!
I'm glad. What a stressful hour though. Good grief.

So, yes...we have a room! The hard part is over. All that's left is to get costumes done and I'm starting this month!! Soooooo much planning!!

Hey, everyone in Atlanta. Looks like we'll be making a trip up there this weekend. Since we don't have the time to go to FL, Steve decided he wants to see his friends in Atlanta before he deploys. You guys all mean a lot to him and he knows you'll help keep me sane while he's gone.
I'm supposed to work Saturday, but there's a chance I'll get off. We all need to meet up. Definitely. If you need my phone ## let me know, k? Or you can all get it from Mary. lol. I'll make a post and let y'all know if I'll have the whole weekend off so we'll have more time to hang out.

Later.

So, has anyone decided on what they are doing for Halloween yet?!?!
I'm at a loss this year. I have no clue. I mean, if there's a Halloween party I really want to do Lady Gaga (one her gazillion outfits), MAYBE. Idunno. I want to do something mainstream (I've done Flo, SuperGirl, Ravenclaw student, Giselle, etc. in the last couple years). I'm just so stuck on what to do!!

Ugh. Oh wells. Anyone care to many any suggestions? =)

Hope everyone is having a good weekend. Back to my homework. I plan to get it all DONE by tomorrow night. Well, I kinda have to.
Night.

Thank you to everyone who PMed me, texted, posted an LJ or left me a FB comment today!! I am so thankful to have such wonderful friends. I really don't know what I'd do with you (trust me, y'all know who you are).

I was beyond lazy today after such a busy weekend. Guess I needed it.
Tomorrow I have class. I have a feeling something was due, but I couldn't find any information in my notes or in the syllabus. It was far too late for me to email my professor. I should have done that in the morning. I've got a bad feeling about this and hope that if something was due she'll let me turn it in late and I'll just deal with losing points.

Just got done watching Dancing with the Stars. DVR-ed Heroes. I really want to watch Castle, but I'm very sleepy. So far it's a good episode. Seems like EVERYTHING is starting back up this week! My poor DVR is going into overtime this week.

I think my sis and I are going to Zonacon in Orlando in November. It just so happens to be the same weekend I requested off to go to FL. Perfect timing or what? They actually have a Repo category for the Cosplay contest, but the registration form says "acts" on it. I'm going to call and see if they allow walk-ons as well cause I'm not doing a skit. I want to show my Shilo, I think. If Terrance, the man himself (who will be there!!) had such high compliments for my Shilo then I feel it's worthy to be entered. Plus, I'll have the boots by then. Now to redo my poor cameo, which broke over the weekend. =( Hopefully it just needs a little glue.

Well, I am off to bed now. Pray that I didn't have anything due and I'm stressing for nothing.
Night all.

First off, I want to say how much I love my husband. Seriously. And I have some of the best friends ever.
I decided that since we were in Atlanta for my birthday I wanted to go to Brio since I saw Meredith's post. I love the food from there and only ever ate leftovers (from my sis) and never ate in, so I decided for my birthday we'd eat there. My husband proceeds to lead me to this table in the back where vampirate777, koneko and micarei are sitting!!! What a surprise!! I guess they've been planing this all week. It was amazing. I was so happy to see them. I love you all!! Definitely made my birthday very special. You guys are amazing and I will definitely make frequent trips to Atlanta when Steve is gone to hang out and get costume help cause y'all are better than me. lol.

Motorsports National Show at Atlanta Motor Speedway: Rained out a lot on Saturday and was beyond miserable. None of the judges came at all. Today (Sunday) it was amazing! The weather stayed beautiful almost all day! Saw some drifting, which was amazing! I had never seen that actually done before, only ever in the movies. It's amazing how the cars sound so loud and obnoxious, yet the drivers make it look so elegant. They gave everyone, who wanted to, the opportunity to drive their personal vehicles on the actual race track! My friend Raymond, in the car club, wanted to do it and I asked him if I could ride along. OMFG it was amazing!! I can't wait to upload the videos from it. AND, the best part, Steve's truck got 2nd place in his class!! What a great pre-deployment gift, his first trophy to present with his truck at more shows. It was a lot of fun and everyone's cars looked great. It was nice getting to hang out with everyone.

Repo! The Genetic Opera, 21st Century Cure shadowcast: A big thank you to my friend Beth for telling is Repo was going on this weekend. Everyone was amazing! They all looked like they were having so much fun. I'm glad I wore my Shilo, too. Terrance Zdunich and Darren Smith, the creators of Repo, were there as well!!!! Two of the sweetest, funniest guys ever. They were both amazing! We got autographs, pictures, etc. And both of them really liked my Shilo costume and said (and I was very surprised they said this) that I was one of the best Shilo's they had ever seen. Um, WOW! I didn't think my Shilo was anything special, but when the creators of that character tell you THAT...yeah, I guess I shouldn't think so low of how I put together a costume. And Steve is buddies with Darren now it seems. lol. Darren gave my husband the title "Official Repo Military Liaison" because he's gonna get Steve's mailing address out in Iraq and send him stuff to help spread the word of Repo. Steve already turned a bunch of friends to Repo and they all love it. I would go on and on about Saturday evening, but I am tired and I'm sure my friends are already mad I'm not giving this a cut. Oh wells...no cut for you!!

Thank you again to Mary, Meredith and Ashley for making my birthday dinner so memorable. It truly meant a lot to me. I want to upload the picture, but I can't find the adapter for my little memory card. =(
I will post pictures and video in another post along with Dragon*Con photo highlights. It's overdue. I'm half-way through resizing all of the pictures Steven took from the photoshoots. The files are just way too big for me to upload right now.

Have a good night and hope y'all had a good weekend, despite the rain.

Ok so ya know those oh-so hard to find Bobbi Blu boots Shilo wears in Repo! The Genetic Opera? Yeah. Guess who just paid $200 for them on Ebay?! ME!!! I'm crazy, right? But they're mine! Steve made me do it. lol. He knew I'd regret it if I didn't win them, so I made sure I did. I gave myself a limit and I only went $2 over it to win the bid. I'm all about the hard-to-find stuff, right? I can't believe I actually won them. I didn't think I would, but I did! That's my birthday present to myself. lol.

In other Repo news, guess what? After the car show tomorrow Steve and I are heading to the Plaza Theatre to see the Atlanta Repo shadowcast, 21st Century Cure! AND, guess what else?! We get to meet Terrance Zdunich and Darren Smith!! Gosh, Repo is everywhere! I'm thrilled! Beyond thrilled.

Yay!! This week is turning out to be amazing!
I'll be sure to post pictures from the weekend. Wish Steve squeven luck and cross your fingers his truck places somewhere in top 3! Preferably 1st in something, cause that would make a great pre-deployment present for him.

Later.